Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
