You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
