I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
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Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
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I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize