I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
