I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize