operation harelip BJ is a go
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Randomize
