No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize
