There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
