I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
