I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
