Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize