I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
