Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
