doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize