found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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