Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Randomize