She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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