I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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