BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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