You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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