True but thats because hes a fetus.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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