Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.