Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
