Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
