My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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