my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
