I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
