I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
