no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
