I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
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