Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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