Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
