If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
