God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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