i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
so that wasnt chicken after all
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
