I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
