is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
