Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Randomize
