i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
