PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
