thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
