Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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