dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
