i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
