She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Randomize