3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
