And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
