please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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