Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Banned from zoo.
Again?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize