Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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