am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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