pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Please, let me fuck your mom
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize